Creationism For Kidz

9 Feb

Creationist propaganda can be both funny and sad. Especially when it is aimed at children. Just for funzies I thought I’d post just a few examples of the kind of absurd nonsense creationists put out there in a desperate attempt to indoctrinate kids against the evils of “Darwinists”. The good news is they do a really shitty job of it.

Harun Yahya is an Islamic creationist website with all kinds of wacky nonsense. I particularly enjoyed the children’s story of Charles Darwin & his Magic Barrel, which proposes the idea that Darwin thought all life came from a barrel or something. Seems like a pretty easy strawman to refute. So why did they need 70 pages to do it in? What kid is going to read 70 goddamn pages of this crap? Hell, I fell asleep after three.
(Sister sites include the disturbing, http://www.truthsforkids.com/ and  http://www.for-children.com/evolution01.html <–This one has cute pictures of kittens & ducklings next to the words, “Evolution is a lie!” Subtle.)

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Here is a link to a creationist dinosaur quiz for kids. I failed it. And if you’re a thinking person you should too.

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Amongst this website’s many tacky rotating gifs is what appears to be a triceratops on a leash being led by a caveman. There are many creationist activities for kids including crossword puzzles & coloring pages with lots of depictions of cavemen petting dinosaurs to ensure your dumbed down child never gets into college.

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Of course Answers in Genesis has a plethora of creationist propaganda for the kiddies. For just $18.99 you can purchase douchebag creationist extraordinaire, Ken Ham’s D Is For Dinosaur book & DVD set or Dinosaurs of Eden. “Young children will learn the true history of the world from creation to Christ to the coming Judgment.” The coming Judgement. Let me stress this is targeted at 2-7 year olds. Yes, what could go wrong with reading a story about the end of the world to a small child at bedtime?

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Kids for Truth is a pretty slick interactive website built for brainwashing. It includes many dynamations like this one in which they have the balls to declare, “Creationism is supported much better by the scientific evidence than evolution.” And you’re just a kid, so you’ll believe it, right? Of course you will…now go play with your Experience the Plagues coloring book.

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Found this one on the “Kid Explorers” section of Christiananswers.net, it’s called Kids, what to do if your teacher is an evolutionist. Better title: The Fast Track to Bringing the Shame of Dover, PA to Your Town.

Oh Christ, there’s SO MANY MORE…

Creation Response Team for kids

Creation for Kids A two-hour “mini-seminarfor those 9 to 15 years old

Dinosaur No More by Little Talkers  “Dinosaurs died out in the flood which God sent upon sinful man.”

Creationism Encyclopedia For Kids

*bkewww*  That was the sound of my brain exploding.

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7 Responses to “Creationism For Kidz”

  1. biodork February 9, 2012 at 9:49 pm #

    This is so disheartening. Makes me glum.

  2. James April 9, 2012 at 10:51 am #

    Evolution is a sham. There is no evidence for it. You hippies want to ruin God’s kingdom and come judgement you shall all burn in hell.

    • Melissa Lee April 9, 2012 at 5:13 pm #

      Ok thanks for your comment. I appreciate the condemnation. For the record I am not a hippie and please read a science book sometime.

      • biodork May 20, 2012 at 4:08 pm #

        Hippie?! Bwaaaaaahahaha! Stephanie Z. also laughed at hearing that someone called you a hippie.

    • Benjamen Johnson April 10, 2012 at 7:55 am #

      James you are a troll and hypocrite. You state that there is no evidence for evolution and procede make even more preposterous claims with zero evidence. Then to boot you insult the author, very christian of you.

      You or someone you know are alive because of evolution. It the basis for biology and by extension modern medicine. You may not realize it, but the very same process of science that brought us evolution also brought us the technology to build computers and the internet. So, to be consistant you might want to get out your chisel and stone tablet and stop using your sham of a computer.

      • Jen July 13, 2012 at 11:02 am #

        Interesting debate. My husband and I debate this very often. Truth of the matter does either side have proof of their belief. What if God is the great Scientist and all of his creations are backed up by science? I don’t believe magic is Gods way and I do believe that gods miracles have science behind them to back them up but I don’t think we have all the answers nor do we understand science the way God does. To me the big bang theory sounds magical and so incredibly unlikely. My kitchen has all the ingredients to make chocolate chip cookies but I have never seen them come together to make a chocolate chip cookie ever. This would be a lot less complex and much more likely for us to see come together before all that it would take to put together a world and life in it. A pastry chef who understands what ingredients to put together to make the cookies makes much more sense to me. My husband would agree with your reasoning. This debate is as old as time and I know we won’t agree. I truly believe in my side of the debate though.

  3. Jen July 13, 2012 at 11:10 am #

    Love this website by the way. You shouldn’t trust just anything. Thank goodness you can question things like the Norwex cloth deal. I am very interested if anyone can prove wether that really does a better job or not. I have a lot of people talking to me about how much they love it but have not purchased any of it because I just don’t know if I buy into it just yet. hmmm….

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